2024-11-19 content
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@@ -4,27 +4,39 @@ episode: 21
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date: 2024-07-17
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---
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# WANTED! GANG TERRORIZES CITY
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Olden Times
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World's Oldest Newspaper
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<section class="prologue">
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> LAST SEEN NIGHT OF DOCK FIRE
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Olden Times
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==========================
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World's Oldest Newspaper
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# Wanted! Gang Terrorizes City
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## Last Seen Night Of Dock Fire
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A strange group, known only as a the Junk Fort Gang, is wanted in conection to a series of crimes, including the burgery at the Iruvian Schoolf of Art, the sinking of the ship Dawn's Hammer, a prison break and subsequent prison fire, the assault on Lord Wott and the subsequent house fire, the theft of the Ma Goo Fin and the subsequent warehouse fire, and the murder of of suspected crime boss Baszo Baz and subsequent dock fire.
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A strange group, known only as a the Junk Fort Gang, is wanted in conection to a series of crimes, including the burgery at the Iruvian Schoolf of Art, the sinking of the ship Dawn's Hammer, a prison break and subsequent prison fire, the assault on Lord Wott and the subsequent house fire, the theft of the Ma Goo Fin and the subsequent warehouse fire, and the murder of of suspected crime boss Baszo Baz and subsequent dock fire.\
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The group is considred armed and very dangerous.\
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They are believed to have left the city in "GarBarge." Reports from the outer Dagger Isles suggest that the crew sailed to Last Hurrah, a famous demon holiday spot, before fleeing towards the Void Sea towards uncharted waters.
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The group is considred arm and very dangerous.
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## Void Sea Disturbances?
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They are believed to have left the city in "GarBarge." Reports from the outer Dagger Isles suggest that the crew sailed to Last Hurrah, a famous demon holiday spot, before fleeing towards the Void Sea towards uncharted waters.
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In completly unrelated news, we bring you a list of unsubstainted reports and rumors fom the literal backwards of the Void Seas:\
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• **Whalers reported a Leviathan attack.** These giant creatures are known for their caviar, which some compare to cat food. Remains of a dingy barge found, but no survivors.\
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• **Fire on Nelson Island.** Reportedly home to a cult of cannibals, witnesses report smelling smoke and the sounds of screams.\
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• **The return of Captain Fitzclyde?** Rumors abound that the famous pirate has been seen again sailing the open seas, now with a strange, nut\-punching, fire starting crew.
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</section>
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<section class="alternate-titles">
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> VOID SEA DISTURBANCES?
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# Alternate Titles
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- "Where's Me Cabin Boy" - Tiger (GM)
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- "Are You a Hobo?" - Tiger (GM)
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- "I Gave Myself the Promotion" - Tiger (GM)
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- "Rule 1: No Waffle Stomping" - Bridget
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- "Strong but Apt" - Tiger (GM)
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- "I Open the Door with My Pant Down" - Boo
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- "Little Leg Liquor" - Tiger (GM)
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- "Djuckles Did You Talk to Patches in His Latrine?" - Boo
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In completly unrelated news, we bring you a list of unsubstainted reports and rumors fom the literal backwards of the Void Seas:
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* Whalers reported a Leviathan attack. These giant creatures are known for their caviar, which some compare to cat food. Remains of a dingy barge found, but no survivors.
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* Fire on Nelson Island. Reportedly home to a cult of cannibals, witnesses report smelling smoke and the sounds of screams
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* The return of Captain Fitzclyde? Rumors abound that the famous pirate has been seen again sailing the open seas, now with a strange, nut\-punching, fire starting crew.
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</section>
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@@ -3,19 +3,17 @@ title: Drums in the Poop Hole
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episode: 26
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date: 2024-09-11
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---
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<hgroup>
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<h1>Paradise Periodical</h1>
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<p>"How do you know what's happening? We're trapped on the ship!"<p>
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<date>2024-09-11</date>
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</hgroup>
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<section class="prologue">
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# Paradise Periodical
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How do you know what's happening? We're trapped on the ship!
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# Strange Times on Stranger Shores
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<article>
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## Holy ghosts!
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> Holy ghosts!
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After being lured in with the promise of hot spas and relaxation, the crew finds them on the strange island of Siempre Tiempre. Djuckles went naked into the jungle. Patches followed, and Squish stayed with the captain on the shore. Eventually, he was tricked into entering the jungle, where the three of them independently stumbled onto the remains of their beloved Garbarge! Each met a strange person, whether it was Old Peg, the beautiful Margaret, or the childlike Maggie\
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\
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The women revealed that they were one in the same, and only Maggie remembered that she had once been the Captain's partner, and had been forsaken on the island. Presumably, since Maggie's a ghost, it means she's dead, but time is funny on this island. They crew can't seem to travel far from the garbarge, and they're isolated from each other, except for their walkie talkies, The crew will have to work to find their way to escape, or else they too will be lost forever on the island.
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After being lured in with the promise of hot spas and relaxation, the crew finds them on the strange island of Siempre Tiempre. Djuckles went naked into the jungle. Patches followed, and Squish stayed with the captain on the shore. Eventually, he was tricked into entering the jungle, where the three of them independently stumbled onto the remains of their beloved Garbarge! Each met a strange person, whether it was Old Peg, the beautiful Margaret, or the childlike Maggie
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The women revealed that they were one in the same, and only Maggie remembered that she had once been the Captain's partner, and had been forsaken on the island. Presumably, since Maggie's a ghost, it means she's dead, but time is funny on this island. They crew can't seem to travel far from the garbarge, and they're isolated from each other, except for their walkie talkies, The crew will have to work to find their way to escape, or else they too will be lost forever on the island.
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</article>
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</section>
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@@ -4,54 +4,45 @@ season: 5
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episode: 27
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date: 2024-10-06
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podcast: true
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tags:
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- season-5
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- campaign-junkfort-boys
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---
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<section class="prologue">
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<hgroup class="masthead">
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# Deep Water Digest
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How do you know what they wished for?
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<date>2024-09-11</date>
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</hgroup>
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# Deep Water Digest
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How do you know what they wished for?
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<hgroup>
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# Day Saved – Baths Had By All
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## Of course he was nude
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# Day Saved – Baths Had By All
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## Of course he was nude
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</hgroup>
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Following the revelation that little Maggie was a ghost, the group got to work. Squish found a guide in Patches' belongings, detailing how to reunite the mind, the spirit, and the body. Patches dug and found Maggie's drums. Djuckles built his own talkie- walkie, and was able to commune with the rest of the group after losing his clothes. He then dug a deep hole, and, finding no body, had to coax Old Peg into the hole. With a quick attune, Patches reunited Margaret in all her forms. As a thank you, Maggie's spirit showed the crew to the secret spa, and granted each of them a whisper. Djuckles wished for friendship, and found acceptance. Squish wished to never hunger, and found satiation. Patches wavered between returning to Lockport, or gaining control of the ship.\
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\
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After their bath, the crew returned to the Kahuna Wave, where the Captain waited for them. They decided to head to the next island, where the Captain has another contest up his sleeve.
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<article>
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Following the revelation that little Maggie was a ghost, the group got to work. Squish found a guide in Patches' belongings, detailing how to reunite the mind, the spirit, and the body. Patches dug and found Maggie's drums. Djuckles built his own talkie\- walkie, and was able to commune with the rest of the group after losing his clothes. He then dug a deep hole, and, finding no body, had to coax Old Peg into the hole. With a quick attune, Patches reunited
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Margaret in all her forms. As a thank you, Maggie's spirit showed the crew to the secret spa, and granted each of them a whisper. Djuckles wished for friendship, and found acceptance. Squish wished to never hunger, and found satiation. Patches wavered between returning to Lockport, or gaining control of the ship.
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After their bath, the crew returned to the Kahuna Wave, where the Captain waited for them. They decided to head to the next island, where the Captain has another contest up his sleeve.
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</article>
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</section>
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<section class="alt-titles">
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<section class="alternate-titles">
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# Alternate Titles
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- "Getting Real Deep Tissue" - Tiger (GM)
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- "Here's 2 Coin for Letting Me Rub You Down" - Tiger (GM)
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- "Gogum Fork" - Tiger (GM)
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- "He's Too God Damned Pleasant" - Tiger (GM)
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- "Its Nice to Have some Pleasantness Sometimes" - Bridget
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- "Roll for Drunk" - Andy
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- "Roll for Prowl" - Andy
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- "Tawney on the Stoop" - Tiger (GM)
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- "Were You Crying?" - Tiger (GM)
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- "It Was that Harold Saxx" - Tiger (GM)
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- "Nicest Drink in the Shittiest Shoe" - Tiger (GM)
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- "Top Intern" - Tiger (GM)
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- "Gone Garbarge" - Tiger (GM)
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- "Real Ship with a Real Captian" - Tiger (GM)
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- "Pushing the Raft" - Tiger (GM)
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- "Lowest Monkey on the Totem Pole" - Tiger (GM)
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- "I Will Pee My Pants" - Tiger (GM)
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- "Your Plan Was to Pee Your Pants" - Tiger (GM)
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- "What the Hell Is a Harp?" - Tiger (GM)
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# Alternate titles:
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- "Getting Real Deep Tissue" - Tiger (GM)
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- "Here's 2 Coin for Letting Me Rub You Down" - Tiger (GM)
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- "Gogum Fork" - Tiger (GM)
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- "He's Too God Damned Pleasant" - Tiger (GM)
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- "Its Nice to Have some Pleasantness Sometimes" - Bridget
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- "Roll for Drunk" - Andy
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- "Roll for Prowl" - Andy
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- "Tawney on the Stoop" - Tiger (GM)
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- "Were You Crying?" - Tiger (GM)
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- "It Was that Harold Saxx" - Tiger (GM)
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- "Nicest Drink in the Shittiest Shoe" - Tiger (GM)
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- "Top Intern" - Tiger (GM)
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- "Gone Garbarge" - Tiger (GM)
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- "Real Ship with a Real Captian" - Tiger (GM)
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- "Pushing the Raft" - Tiger (GM)
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- "Lowest Monkey on the Totem Pole" - Tiger (GM)
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- "I Will Pee My Pants" - Tiger (GM)
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- "Your Plan Was to Pee Your Pants" - Tiger (GM)
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- "What the Hell Is a Harp?" - Tiger (GM)
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</section>
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content/episodes/s05/e30.md
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---
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title:
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date: 2024-11-18
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episode: 30
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---
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<section class="prologue">
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# Dark Water Weekly
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No, no, don't come in here!
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# Fire In Your House And In Your Heart
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Our crew regathered in the vault room, passing an overjoyed Hotman as he set yet another fine establishment ablaze. Squish remembered Djuckles had made gas masks for this purpose. Djuckles remembered that he had forgotten whether he had made exploding masks or protective masks, so it was a real wild card.\
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\
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They convinced Lady High Hill to retreat to her room with the chest. Djuckles and Lady High Hill escaped through the window, with Djuckles suffering a few injuries on the way down. Djuckles ran back inside the house, where he saved Lord High Hill, and told the real Captain of their plight. Patches and Squish stayed to fight for the chest. Despite three of the four gas masks exploding in their favor, it was still a tough battle.Soon they were backed into a corner, with fire behind them, and guards between them and their prize. Suddenly, the Captain burst in, beard and eyes blazing. He snatched the chest, and rescued his crew mates.\
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\
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As they made a hasty retreat, Lady High Hill warned Djuckels about the true nature of the harp. It can cause anyone who hears it to obey the player, and now it's in the hands of a murderous ghost pirate.
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</section>
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<section class="alternate-titles">
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* _"I Thought It Was a Fish"_ \- Tiger (GM)
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* _"I Got Hammocked This Morning"_ \- Tiger (GM)
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* _"The Mutiny Habits"_ \- Bridget
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* _"Im Just Moody"_ \- Andy
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* _"Trying to Cheer up Djuckles"_ \- Tiger (GM)
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* _"He's Never Liked Any of You"_ \- Tiger (GM)
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* _"Baked Alaska"_ \- Tiger (GM)
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* _"Squishlicious over There"_ \- Tiger (GM)
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* _"What Even Is a Shallot"_ \- Tiger (GM)
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* _"That Was a Very Touching Moment in My Head"_ \- Tiger (GM)
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* _"Glittering From the Land"_ \- Tiger (GM)
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</section>
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@@ -2,5 +2,6 @@
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"season": 5,
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"tags": [
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"junkfort-boyz"
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]
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],
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"stylesheets": ["/css/s05.css"]
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}
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