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content/episodes/s05/e21.md

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+---
+title: "Is here good? Questionable."
+episode: 21
+date: 2024-07-17
+---
+
+# WANTED! GANG TERRORIZES CITY
+Olden Times
+World's Oldest Newspaper
+
+![](worlds/bridgets-in-the-dark/newspapers/Screenshot%202024-07-14%20144345.png)  
+> LAST SEEN NIGHT OF DOCK FIRE
+
+A strange group, known only as a the Junk Fort Gang, is wanted in conection to a series of crimes, including the burgery at the Iruvian Schoolf of Art, the sinking of the ship Dawn's Hammer, a prison break and subsequent prison fire, the assault on Lord Wott and the subsequent house fire, the theft of the Ma Goo Fin and the subsequent warehouse fire, and the murder of of suspected crime boss Baszo Baz and subsequent dock fire.
+
+The group is considred arm and very dangerous.
+
+They are believed to have left the city in "GarBarge." Reports from the outer Dagger Isles suggest that the crew sailed to Last Hurrah, a famous demon holiday spot, before fleeing towards the Void Sea towards uncharted waters.  
+
+
+
+> VOID SEA DISTURBANCES?
+
+In completly unrelated news, we bring you a list of unsubstainted reports and rumors fom the literal backwards of the Void Seas:
+
+* Whalers reported a Leviathan attack. These giant creatures are known for their caviar, which some compare to cat food. Remains of a dingy barge found, but no survivors.
+* Fire on Nelson Island. Reportedly home to a cult of cannibals, witnesses report smelling smoke and the sounds of screams
+* The return of Captain Fitzclyde? Rumors abound that the famous pirate has been seen again sailing the open seas, now with a strange, nut\-punching, fire starting crew.
+
+ 

content/episodes/s05/e22.md

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+---
+title: "Playing for Keepys"
+episode: 22
+date: 2024-07-31
+---
+
+<p class="newspaper-name">Bon Voyage Bulletin</p> <p class="newspaper-tagline">Who's Printing These</p> <p class="newspaper-date">2024-07-31</p> <h2>New Ship, New Identities, New Troubles!</h2> <img src="worlds/bridgets-in-the-dark/assets/pages/DzemxJwopdWfbkJL-pages-eRwwiS7HLC9dqNDO-Screenshot%202024-07-31%20173438-bdapgjPbRm0t6Owo.png"> <blockquote>     <p></p> </blockquote> <div class="newspaper-content">     <p>Our crew was shocked to learn that one of their own, the former "Captain" Clyde, was an imposter! "Patches," his "real" name, was revealed to be the former cabin boy of the real Captain Clyde. After successfully mutinying, Patches was chucked overboard a week later. The real captain began hunting down his old crew, and finally, has the last and first betrayer in sight.</p>     <p>But after some sweet talking from Squish and Chuckles, the captain has allowed the gang to remain on his ship as his crew. His rules are simple: clean up after yourself, and obey his orders.</p>     <p>However, cleanliness and obedience are not the Garbarge boys strength, and already there's some grumbling and talks about overthrowing the Captain, and taking his boat.</p>     <p>After a night of some heart to heart talks, they are ready for their first big task: deciding where they heck they're going to go.</p>     <p>Mysteries abound. What is the Captain up to? What is he looking for, and where are they going? Why did Patches mutiny, and will the crew survive his deception?</p> </div>

content/episodes/s05/e23.md

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+---
+title: "Brother of Good Sir"
+episode: 23
+date: 2024-08-14
+---
+

content/episodes/s05/e24.md

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+---
+title: "Invasive Questions and Generally Being Pests"
+episode: 24
+date: 2024-08-27
+---
+
+<p class="newspaper-name">Oceanside Weekly</p> <p class="newspaper-tagline">There's a Printing Press Down Here?</p> <p class="newspaper-date">2023-08-25</p> <h2>"FISH" OUT OF WATER</h2> <img src="worlds/bridgets-in-the-dark/Screenshot%202024-08-25%20162737.png"> <blockquote>     <p></p> </blockquote> <div class="newspaper-content">     <p>In preperation for their voyage to Tycheros, the gang returned to Last Hurrah. Djuckles found some materials for some speakers, a task assigned to him on request from the Red Captain.</p>     <p class="p1">Squish met a reluctant cartographer, who agreed to sell a map at a bargain, in exchange for some monk fish.</p>     <p class="p1">Luckily, Squish had caught such a fish earlier that day, and sent Djuckles and Patches back to the ship to retrieve it.</p>     <p class="p1">While Djuckles met up with Squish, Patches took the the opportunity to spy on the Real Captain. All he was doing was practicing the ukulele, and failing, badly.</p>     <p>Meanwhile, after the sucessful negotations, Squish and Djuckles headed back to the boat. Squish became distracted, and then bewitched, by a band of demon flautist. Djuckles used his might fish to knock some sense into Squish, and the pair retreated to the ship, but not before receiving a free CD from the demon band.</p>     <p class="p1">The crew now awaits their next instructions. They've been warned about the dangers of Tycheros, but like most warnings and foreshadowing, this probably will be ignored.</p> </div>

content/episodes/s05/e25.md

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+---
+title: "No, no, there's only two garbarges"
+episode: 25
+date: 2024-09-11
+---
+
+<p class="newspaper-name">Bon Voyage Bulletin</p> <p class="newspaper-tagline">No, I will not call you Gutenburg</p> <p class="newspaper-date">2024-09-11</p> <h2>A Day At Sea Unravels More Mysteries</h2> <img src="worlds/bridgets-in-the-dark/Screenshot%202024-09-11%20180943.png"> <blockquote>     <p>Who is "Maggie?"</p> </blockquote> <div class="newspaper-content">     <p>The crew spent the next day arguing about what to do for their next move. Eventually, it was agreed that they would prepare to travel to Tycheros, despite their misgivings about (both) captains.</p>     <p>Squish caught a large angler fish, and Fitzclyde declared they would eat in his cabin tonight. "Plodable" expert Djuckels painted the cannon with some sick flames, which did not increase it's effectivness, but did increase it's coolness. Patches, per usual, spent time cooped up in the bathroom, talking to Neelix, whio suggested that Patches might get further if he connected with his crew mates, and tried to be a bit more honest with them.</p>     <p>But Patches isn't the only person hiding something. Djuckles met a mysterious girl named Maggie, who claims to work on the ship. She quicly disapeared somewhere on the ship, and Fitzelyde claims to know nothing about her. He tried telling the crew a story about a harp, but, as usual, they weren't listening, and instead insulted his poor ukelele playing. He regrests inviting them for dinner.</p>     <p>But all that will have to wait. Because a migrating school of leviathans stands between the crew and their next stop, and who knows what lies beyond?</p> </div>

content/episodes/s05/e26.md

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+---
+title: Drums in the Poop Hole
+season: 5
+episode: 26
+date: 2024-09-11
+---
+<hgroup>
+<h1>Paradise Periodical</h1>
+<p>"How do you know what's happening? We're trapped on the ship!"<p>
+<date>2024-09-11</date>
+</hgroup>
+
+# Strange Times on Stranger Shores
+<article>
+
+> Holy ghosts!
+
+After being lured in with the promise of hot spas and relaxation, the crew finds them on the strange island of Siempre Tiempre. Djuckles went naked into the jungle. Patches followed, and Squish stayed with the captain on the shore. Eventually, he was tricked into entering the jungle, where the three of them independently stumbled onto the remains of their beloved Garbarge! Each met a strange person, whether it was Old Peg, the beautiful Margaret, or the childlike Maggie
+
+ The women revealed that they were one in the same, and only Maggie remembered that she had once been the Captain's partner, and had been forsaken on the island. Presumably, since Maggie's a ghost, it means she's dead, but time is funny on this island. They crew can't seem to travel far from the garbarge, and they're isolated from each other, except for their walkie talkies, The crew will have to work to find their way to escape, or else they too will be lost forever on the island.
+ 
+ </article>

content/episodes/s05/e27.md

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+---
+title: Lowest Monkey on the Totem Pole
+season: 5
+episode: 27
+date: 2024-10-06
+podcast: true
+tags: 
+ - season-5 
+ - campaign-junkfort-boys
+---
+
+<section class="prologue">
+ <hgroup class="masthead">
+ 
+ # Deep Water Digest
+ How do you know what they wished for?
+ <date>2024-09-11</date>
+ </hgroup>
+
+ <hgroup>
+
+ # Day Saved – Baths Had By All
+ ## Of course he was nude
+ </hgroup>
+
+ <article>
+ Following the revelation that little Maggie was a ghost, the group got to work. Squish found a guide in Patches' belongings, detailing how to reunite the mind, the spirit, and the body. Patches dug and found Maggie's drums. Djuckles built his own talkie\- walkie, and was able to commune with the rest of the group after losing his clothes. He then dug a deep hole, and, finding no body, had to coax Old Peg into the hole. With a quick attune, Patches reunited
+
+ Margaret in all her forms. As a thank you, Maggie's spirit showed the crew to the secret spa, and granted each of them a whisper. Djuckles wished for friendship, and found acceptance. Squish wished to never hunger, and found satiation. Patches wavered between returning to Lockport, or gaining control of the ship.
+
+ After their bath, the crew returned to the Kahuna Wave, where the Captain waited for them. They decided to head to the next island, where the Captain has another contest up his sleeve.
+ </article>
+</section>
+
+<section class="alt-titles">
+
+# Alternate titles:
+- "Getting Real Deep Tissue" - Tiger (GM)
+- "Here's 2 Coin for Letting Me Rub You Down" - Tiger (GM)
+- "Gogum Fork" - Tiger (GM)
+- "He's Too God Damned Pleasant" - Tiger (GM)
+- "Its Nice to Have some Pleasantness Sometimes" - Bridget
+- "Roll for Drunk" - Andy
+- "Roll for Prowl" - Andy
+- "Tawney on the Stoop" - Tiger (GM)
+- "Were You Crying?" - Tiger (GM)
+- "It Was that Harold Saxx" - Tiger (GM)
+- "Nicest Drink in the Shittiest Shoe" - Tiger (GM)
+- "Top Intern" - Tiger (GM)
+- "Gone Garbarge" - Tiger (GM)
+- "Real Ship with a Real Captian" - Tiger (GM)
+- "Pushing the Raft" - Tiger (GM)
+- "Lowest Monkey on the Totem Pole" - Tiger (GM)
+- "I Will Pee My Pants" - Tiger (GM)
+- "Your Plan Was to Pee Your Pants" - Tiger (GM)
+- "What the Hell Is a Harp?" - Tiger (GM)
+</section>

content/episodes/s05/s05.json

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+{
+  "season": 5,
+  "tags": [
+    "season-5", "campaign-junkfort-boys"
+  ],
+  "categories":[
+    "Fiction",
+    "Comedy",
+    "Leisure",
+    "Games"
+  ],
+  "itunesAuthor":"itunesAuthor",
+  "itunesExplicit": true
+}

content/episodes/s05/s05.md

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+---
+layout: podcast-season
+season: 5
+override:tags: ["season"]
+---